Paranormal

Ghostbusters 101

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I have always thought that I must possess a special mark that is only visible to certain otherworldly entities, sort of like Hester Prynne but not for the same reason.  I only wish that someone would tell me what I did to run afoul of those who inhabit a certain dimension.  Or maybe I was born with an ability to encourage denizens of another world to make that trip through the portal.  Maybe this is just another type of original sin visited upon me (thank you again, Sister Mary Elephant)… How many kinds can there be, for Christ’s sake?

Considering that quite some time has passed since the following events occurred, I feel safe in recounting them to you.

Until I met up with this entity, my adventures with the paranormal were fairly benign – poltergeist phenomena since I was three years old, a conversation with Hawaiian goddess Pele on a Honolulu city bus (a story for another time), seeing dead people, you know, regular stuff.  Nothing particularly hair raising, not when you have grown up with such things. It’s well known that Irish people have a gift for the fey, whether they like it or not.

Ghostbusters 101 – Do Not Play with Demons.  They are not your friends.  You cannot control what happens.  They just want more and more.  And they are very poor sports when you try to cut them off. But the most important thing to remember:  They are not human and never were.

Cursing at them will only make them laugh.  What does “Goddam you” mean to them?  That is an aforegone conclusion.  Duh, this fact is nothing new to them.  They know they have been damned and they’re not happy about it, but this is the hand that they have been dealt, way back then.

They like to hang out in old buildings or in areas where something horrendous has taken place because they feed off the residual energy.  They especially run rampant in Hawai’i, concentrating their population near old native battlegrounds where Night Marchers (another story for another time) still like to hang out.  However, like the extra-terrestrials in the movie “Signs,” I have noticed that they don’t seem to be especially fond of getting too close to the water.

Sister Mary Elephant taught us that water is mentioned many times in the Bible.  Still water, flowing water, and remember how Moses parted the seas?  Water ensures our salvation.  Water is so spiritually cleansing that everyone knows vampires will not cross anything that has flowing water under it.

It makes sense that demons are extra powerful on an island.  They have no way to escape.  They can’t even sightsee.  I bet they were ecstatic about the Super Ferry until one of them said, “Hey stupid, you realize we won’t be able to ride on it,” and this fact must have been followed by a collective groan.

So they remain kind of bored and they get their kicks when and where they can.  And once they find a human that they can, sort of, have a flow of consciousness with, watch out.  They are in Heaven (well, no, not them).  But their existences have improved immeasurably.

But I digress.

This is how it starts.  First, because they are lazy, they will try to find a person who has an ability to communicate with otherworldly spirits.  It’s hard to explain how this works; imagine a garage door that is shut.  In your mind, you will open this door.  Electric or manual, makes no difference.  You open the door to your consciousness, and then wait.

Ha!  Never again!

I had moved to a new house (not near the water) and I was intrigued, I admit, when I woke up one night to see the quilt being pulled back from my legs.  I thought it was the dog but he was not on the bed.  In fact, he was nowhere to be seen.  I had the feeling that something was looking at me, just benevolently gazing.  I said to myself, well, I just moved in here so something is checking me out.  I was kind of flattered, I admit.  Someone/something was looking at my legs, imagine that!  Then I was like, “Oh boy,” another entity from the great beyond.  I – yes – freed up my consciousness, why not, and went back to sleep.

Why not, indeed.

Later on, during that same night, I must have dangled one arm down on the side of the bed.  Something licked my hand.  Again, I thought it was the dog.  But he is a Chihuahua and I had the impression of a large dog with heavy fur around its neck.  I peered over the side of the bed.  Nothing there.  I still was not alarmed.  I thought that maybe a dog’s spirit was in the room, guarding me.  But I didn’t remember the landlord saying that the previous tenants had a dog there.  Oh well.  Strangely comforted by what I took to be a warmhearted, kindly guardian spirit, I went back to sleep.

Things progressed pretty quickly after that.  The entity now had a foot in the door.

It would often breathe heavily in my face to wake me up.  Once, sleepily, I put my arms around its neck, again feeling the heavy fur.

Encouraged by this, one night I felt it trying to get on the bed.  I was tired, seeing as how this thing was constantly keeping me company.  I actually moved over to make room for it!  I felt it scrabble up on the bed.  It took up very little room, actually.  I had the feeling that it was not a dog at all but some kind of a straight figure.  It lay there looking up at the ceiling.  All I know is that it was quiet, and that was all I wanted.  Peace and quiet, so I could sleep!  I’ve become accustomed to having strange creatures in my bed.  This was nothing new.

My family came to visit, and my eldest daughter asked if the house “had something in it” because she said she kept seeing movement out of the corner of her eyes, but when she turned her head, nothing was there.

Classic.

Nothing much happened while they were there, but once they had left, things seemed to accelerate.  Starting with the lights.

Another common phenomena – orbs of light circled the wall at the foot of my bed and also on the bed.  I knew what they were but these were actually kind of pretty, and I had never seen so many of them at one time.  I would watch them until tiredness overtook me.

Its shape shifting abilities increased; now and then I could make out a shadow person.  This figure would stand at the window and look out, and sometimes bend over the bed to peer at me.

The feeling of benevolence was quickly dissipating.  I realized that this time, for the first time ever, I felt that I was in over my head.

If you open the door to a demon, and then you show fear, you are giving it what it wants; it gathers strength through this negative energy.  Sort of a bastardized version of “If You Give a Mouse a Cookie”…The list will go on and on and you don’t want to know what’s at the end of it.

Also, I was suffering from sleep deprivation.  The time had come for the entity to go.

Down went the garage door (figuratively, for I had no garage, with a door or without).

I decided that if I couldn’t sleep during the night, then neither was the entity going to sleep during the day.

Out came the holy water and the crucifix, and I danced around the bedroom like Madonna in the video (well, not exactly).

I had a few nights’ rest, except for the one during which I heard a blood-curdling scream emanating from the upstairs apartment.  The thing was evidently paying them a visit.

It was also pissed and busy gathering its strength.

The night it came back, I had unconsciously put my hand down again on the side of the bed.  I woke up when I felt a sharp bite.  That was disturbing enough, but the entity showed itself as a stream of lights along the floor when it ran off, laughing.  However, that laugh was nasty and a portent and a promise of worse things to come.  This house was infected and infested with negative energy seemingly propelled by this singular earth-bound demonic entity.

The shadow figure appeared more frequently and in different areas of the house, and emanating from it was a treacherous, angry feeling. It could easily pass through the walls and this facilitated its ability to frighten me.  Several times, I really and truly wished that I had been wearing a diaper.

I had effectively shut off communication with the creature and this obviously enraged it. And it had harbored such high hopes at the beginning, to actually be invited in!

I moved out shortly after this, not wanting to wait around to see what happened, and into a house right on the beach.

Nothing followed me.  At least, not then.  Not for three years.

Then I moved back to the mainland.

The reverberations from the unholy contact of three years ago stay with me.  I now live in a newer house that only had one other family inhabit it.  This is a new subdivision.  There are several churches very close to me that have fountains of holy water.  All of these reasons should encourage me to let down my guard.  But I am still a little concerned because I am not close to the water.

And this concern was not unfounded.

During the last month, I have felt the occasional quick taps on my shoulder and the unsettling touch as something unseen brushes past me.  My peripheral vision has registered furtive movements from behind me.  I refuse to open that portal again.  I will not engage with it. So far, it leaves me alone at night and when I sleep.  However, I do keep my hands safely under the covers, as a precaution.  But still…

It’s behind me now, isn’t it?

 

Sally Stratso

Sally Stratso is a character actress, standup comedienne, and writer. Her work has appeared in Grit Magazine, Equus Magazine, Indie Slate, and Lemons Publications. She used to live in Honolulu, Hawai'i and has now relocated to Corpus Christi, Texas.

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