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Steven Levi (USA)


Heinz Noonan, the “Bearded Holmes” of the Sandersonville Police Department, was locked in a life-or-death struggle with the online Thesaurus when Harriet snatched his pencil-scrawled list of synonyms for ‘life or death’ from his desk. “There is a cattle baron from Greenville just dying to talk to you,” she snickered as she said the word dying. “Dying?” Noonan repeated with a question mark on his face. “If he’s a cattle baron, then an alternative term might be slaughtered, demised, expired, exterminated, extirpated, decimated, expunged, deleted. .” Before he could go on, Harriet terminated the sentence — and used the word in her sentence – with a snicker. “It’s one of those cases you get to solve every sixteen or seventeen seconds. It’s about cows. Or cattle. They’re all the same to me, $6.99 a pound unless you want to go organic. I’m not sure.” “He’s got a beef?” Noonan’s face…