Nowadays love is something that can happen in an instant. Most people don’t think twice before making commitments that they can’t fulfil. So when one does enter a relationship, the blanket of love can be very thick for the ones to see the difference between obsession and love. I bet you have seen many couples in your life, some weirdly happy in their own made-up world, which makes their relationship so damn cute. While there are others choking each other out and hardly leaving any space for individual growth. Although both are the very outcomes of “true love”, let’s dwell upon some of the factors that separate them.
Cute love is something that can be seen or experienced when one is young or has a crush on someone. The blushing cheeks whenever our eyes meet and the butterflies in our stomach always seem restless. Every person has a different experience, and lucky are those whose school sweetheart end up as their life partners. These are the people who face the world together and do not let anything come in between them. They will always have beautiful advice that will renew your faith in love. While it may look cute and sweet to all, there are some who will always look down upon their pure love and have something spiteful to add. These are the so-called jealous admirers. Even though they admire the love of the unbreakable couple, there is also a pint of jealousy that they don’t want to hide. These people are some of those who have failed in love or being cheated on and whatnots. It’s not their fault actually; the circumstances have changed their faith. Many people have failed in love or marriage, some more than once or twice, and the heart can take so much pain. I guess not everybody is lucky in love. They have survived the world but maybe not the heartache.
But those who are lucky do not have it all. They face challenges together too. Instead of giving up, they fight back and believe in their partner’s loyalty, which is a rare quality these days. People are more loyal to their needs and bank accounts rather than their spouse. A loyal partner is worth holding on to, trust me!
While the topic of love is quite vast to explore in a single paragraph, let’s discuss the elements of obsession in love. Obsession can be related to anything, but in love, it can be strangling. Some confuse love with obsession, but it is a different version with just a thin veil of love if you can notice. Let’s analyse with an example. An acquaintance of mine used to be a very hard worker and a perfectionist in whatever she did. Be it grades or job, she was always the one who did it best and succeeded too. One fine day, a new guy joined her office, and she was love-struck by this handsome fellow. Not only handsome, but he was also charming and loved by all. Many girls were attracted to him, but he was intrigued by our Miss Perfectionist. Soon they began dating, and she was on cloud 9 like most people when in new love. Everything was going great between them for some months until she started to notice Mr. Charming’s change of behaviour towards her. He began to neglect her and would go out with friends and enjoy, while she sat at home worrying about his whereabouts, checking her phone every minute for a single message or call, going through his Facebook pages to check where he is. Suddenly, it seemed like this guy has taken over the place that she once was the owner. She was the one who everybody came to for advice on different matters, and not just work, invited her to parties and get-togethers, but now this guy not only took her place but also made her look like a fool in front of everybody. Have you come across this scenario in your social life?
Similarly, a guy can be in the perils of obsession too. And in extreme situations, the patriarchy seems to take over as men can be seen to take up mental and physical abuse towards their partner to showcase their dominance. Some guys become so obsessive that the mere thought of their lover working in an office with male counterparts can lead them to be suspicious, which is what happened with another friend of mine. She would be scared most of the time, avoid going to parties or picnics organized by the company just for the fear of being subjected to torture by her fiancé. It went on for a year, until one day she had enough. It so happened that she had gone to meet a client along with a male colleague to make a big deal. She was dodging his calls the whole day to avoid distractions and prepare for the meeting. But all hell hath lose when she returned to the office and saw him waiting for her in there. Before she could explain anything, he started to yell at her in front of everybody else making a scene for others, even pointing to her character, which was the last straw. This is when she stood up and slapped him in front of everybody and stormed out. What would you do in such a situation?
So love can be many things, but when it becomes something that is controlling your life, it leaves out all the emotions that make it a beautiful experience. Love is the sentiment that needs to be cherished and celebrated, not a burden that needs to be fulfilled and carried for a lifetime.